Videogames are stupid! (“Fitter, happier, more productive, comfortable”),

7 Nov

So now you got this new game called Dragon Age: Origins, right? And I saw a Xbox live segment about it, yes? Where I can get this Golem right? And it can like develop it’s own personality, so when it’s like with dwarfs something happens cuz they forgotten how to make them or something? Which is cool. Then I get to use my sword on stuff and kill things. But do I get a video game that is about clues and thinking? NO! I get Golem who develop personality!!!!Dragon_Age

The point is… Why is every video game in the making so braindeadly dull? Now, there was a time where games was meant to be made for people who liked to think, and not just people who wants to escape from reality. I am not afraid of violence in videogames, I am afraid that every game made from now on will kill our brains with flashy pictures and nonsense.

BUT DID YOU SEE HIS HEAD EXPLODE? Wow! Like BANG SPLUSH. Thats cool. You want to smoke some weed?

I have been looking for a game for a while that is entertaining, stimulating, exciting and do not give me headackes and lots of stress. A game that would not get me unnecessary angry. In other words I look for a game that could be the new Resident Evil 0-3 or Killer7 (the story, not gameplay). So I searched the different discussions around on the web for a game I could like. I thought (and still do) that my genre of choice would be Action-Adventure and there where very few to Xbox360. Something like Monkey Island, but with a little less strange riddle solutions (“A flagg could be used as a skull??? Yes, it is a pirate flag… but still!“), and with an exciting plot.

256px-CondemnedSo someone on the internet recommended Condemned! I read on the cover that I would play an FBI agent who needs to find clues left by a killer! “Wow”, I thought. “I get to be Mulder and Scully. I can play Clarise chasing a murderer. How clever and exciting!” But…
*Bliping* hell! That was not the game I was thinking of at all! Yes, it was scary, but it also made me angry and it contained no real puzzles. It was just another run, run, run shot, explode, jump, jump (in seat) kill, press buttons, press buttons, press, press, aim, die, try again.

Oh, how I remember a funny game called Discworld noir… I LOVE THAT GAME! I could play a detective who did real detective stuff without using guns and running and shooting! I AM SO EFFING TIERED OF GAMES THAT REALLY do ONE THING; TEST HOW FAST I CAN’T HIT BUTTONS!
Discworld_Noir_Coverart

There were clues in Discworld Noir. You talked to people and found clues and then the written clues in your diary could be added together to create new clues or solutions.

I am just so tiered of hitting buttons and then dieing and then starting some place earlier and then succeeding and then just not care.

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(Blog update 11/13-2009: I have decided to read a book instead.)
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(Blog update 11/19-2009: There seems to be a kid who feels just the same as I. But he shouldn’t drink milk at the Korova Milk Bar. That milk is bad for you!)

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